Tuesday, June 30, 2009

If there is any possible good that could come out of Michael Jackson’s death, maybe it is that it will shake up the world of pop music and celebrity in general. The sad fact is that it probably won’t. Typically deaths of popular icons can cause a shift away from destructive behavior and this could still happen. It has before. No one knows yet exactly what caused Michaels death and we may never know. It could very easily be one of those freak occurrences that seems to have no real cause. It is hard to imagine a heart problem could go unnoticed by his physicians but it is possible. However Michael died and no matter what you thought of him, it cannot be denied that he was a tortured soul.

The allegations of child abuse and Michael’s allegations of his abuse at the hands of his father is well known. If he really was abused no amount of money or fame can heal those wounds. They could have easily lead to his infatuation with children that lead to the greatest controversy of his life. It could just as easily have lead to his life long commitment to children’s charities around the world. Only a man deeply unhappy with himself could undergo as much plastic surgery as he did.

Michael had an influence on pop music that hadn’t been seen since the Beetles. He revolutionized the way we “saw” music. His contributions to music video will probably never be surpassed. Besides video he also revolutionized music and dance. You cannot deny his effect on pop culture and the world would be a different place today without MJ.

Still his best days musically were behind him. He was never able to top Thriller or even approach its popularity or critical success. He was no longer a revolutionary but a man fighting for a comeback. He still sold millions of records but he was no longer an innovator. Would his new tour revitalize his career, sadly we will never know now. It is one of the morbid facts of our culture that death increases interest in an artist. Michael’s downloads and record sales will soar in the next few months. Songs will be written about him, for him and dedicated to him. His loyal fans will be heartbroken. There could possibly be a resurgence in the “Michael look” of sequined gloves and red leather jackets. Only time will tell how it will affect our pop culture.

Maybe his death will lead people to be happier with who they are and not go down dangerous pathways in order to change. It’s ironic that a man who told us we could all be special, just by being ourselves, could never be happy with himself. Hopefully girls who starve themselves in pursuit of perceived beauty will take heed. Perhaps celebrities who live destructive lives will take a look a Michael, then take his advice and take a look at themselves. Even if his death wasn’t drug related Jacko squandered a fortune most celebrities will never get close to having.

The sad part is that it probably won’t have much of an effect. As cruel as it sounds Michael lived too long to be a good example of what not to do. Fifty is an age most young people can’t comprehend. When River Phoenix died, young Hollywood took notice and things changed for a while. People around the world will cry that he “died too soon” but the phrase will have little meaning. To young Hollywood, Michael was just a old man. An old freaky man who wanted to stay young forever. Michael will be laid to rest while we sing his songs and a week later the party will go on.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

short update

Just a short update. Even though I still think my career is effectively over in Healthcare I applied for seven new jobs in the field this morning. No real hope for any of them but it felt constructive and I had nothing else to do. Last night I did a little more work on one of the scripts I am working on. I have never written a script before but I have toyed wth writing for years. Who knows maybe everythign will break at once, finish a script and sell it, and get a new job. I'm not holding my breath on that though. Oxygen is still free and I'm enjoying the hell out of it.
Peace

Thursday, June 18, 2009

My Career rant

My career in the medical field is over. I'm tired of the BS, of recruiters who don't call, of jobs posted that aren't really open. I'm tired of the hypocrisy of the medical field. I could have killed a patient and I would still have a job. I know several people who have lost their job due to negligence and they were working again within a month or so. I was just unlucky enough to violate the flavor of the week at the wrong time and to be in a field that is way to crowded with job seekers. I was an X ray tech. I was damn good. I was fast, efficient and the patients loved me. None of that mattered and it doesn't now. I'm trying to hold back from a full fledged rant but I don't know why, my career is either dead or damaged beyond repair already. My last interview they flew me across country , got me a nice rental car, and put me up in a nice hotel. It really looked good. Today I get a form E-mail rejection and I see the same job posted again on career builder.com. I spent almost 200 dollars in gas, food and getting a state license for the job. Maybe I was dumb getting the license but they told me I needed it in hand to be considered for the job. I have spent way too much of my limited funds on faxes, gas and other crap looking for a job in my "career." I can't draw unemployment because I was terminated. My savings are gone. The last week I have spent applying at Wal-Mart and Rent A Center. I can't afford to pay my phone bill, or make my next student loan payment. I will probably be cashing in my retirement account to try and survive for a few more months. I don't have much and the taxes will cut that in half. I have spent 18 years of my adult life working, six in school and at 41 I have nothing but bitterness to show for it. Everyone tells me I will find a job but you know what there are a lot of people who haven't. All the work I put into clearing up and fixing my credit is going down the drain. There is no government help to pay my bills, there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Did I make a mistake? Yes, I freely admit that. Did I deserve to be fired. You decide. I'm tired, tired of playing nice, tired of being honorable, tired of trying to help. I am just tired. I'm ready to go to bed and not wake up. To my friends out there who have been by my side I love you all, more than words can say. To the "Christian" who made the decison to fire me, hey you were just doing your job, nothing personal but I hope you hypocrits all choke on it